Round Salami and Square Bread- the Sandwich Debacle
Before I get to the title of my post let me first recount what has gone on in my ever-so-interesting life the past few days.
Friday night I went to Ele's house to see her new room and hang out with everyone. Had a great time basically acting like little kids on her, pillow fights and rough-housing etc. Played some board games too and just hung out. The most fun I've had in a few weeks. Saturday night I watched the first episode of the 3rd season or the OC (it's such a soap opera but I can't stop watching) with Katz, Nadiv and Ren. We were going to watch three episodes but the second was all screwy so we watched the Family Guy movie instead. Halfway through, I cut Nadiv's hair while Katz and Ren watched the rest. From what I saw it was a pretty funny movie although very crude. This brings me to the title of this post.
There is a scene in the movie where Peter Griffin,the dad, is complaining about how salami (actually I think it was bologna) is round but bread is square. As he said that it hit me that he was so right! I was outraged. Ok, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration. But think about it. It causes the corners of the bread to not have any tasty meat filling when you eat a sandwich! What's up with that?! I immediately exclaimed that I had to blog about this, to which I heard a resounding chorus of laughter coming from my friends.
So anyway, today as I was contemplating how to go about my rant on this subject it hit me: Some breads are round; and some meats are square! It's our own faults if our sandwiches' corners are left barren; not the meat production companies, and least of all the cows! One must simply take the time to choose the suitable meat for the type of bread being used in the sandwich or the suitable bread for said meat! So simple! For example one could use 2 regular pieces of white bread and square turkey breast or 2 slices of baguette or round roll filled with salami or bologna. For difficult sizes and shapes such as corn beef or roast beef that tend to be long and thin, one can use a baguette cut lengthwise or a giabetta! Problem solved! Nuclear apocalypse avoided! Too many exclamation marks, I think I pulled a muscle with all that enthusiasm!
With that, I hope none of you will ever loose any more sleep on that horrible dilemma that I'm sure you have been loosing sleep over for many years. Anyone who wishes to pass the money they would be spending on sleeping pills to me can contact me at the e-mail to the left. Any money earned by using the time previously used to cut corners off of sandwiches, to work will also be accepted. Please do not contact me to request reimbursement for any money you lost by reading this post. Your e-mail will promptly be deleted and a pack of flying monkeys will be dispatched to your house to brutally beat you with various types of deli meats. Just for shits and giggles.